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Beauty In The Real

I honestly never know what he is going to say! But I think this one was a good reminder for our Monday! Now get out there and share what you have!

#sometimesautismlookslikethis #beautyinthereal

I honestly never know what he is going to say! But I think this one was a good reminder for our Monday! Now get out there and share what you have!

#sometimesautismlookslikethis #beautyinthereal

“You are such FUN parents!”

This comment came in recently, and my immediate thought was… well, that needs a little context.

Because the truth is, neither of us really wanted to go sledding today. But we’re Jonah’s only option for a fun life, and if we don’t make these moments happen, no one else will. So we layered up in snow gear, loaded the car, and went in search of adventure.

What that actually looks like is careful planning and a lot of mental gymnastics—dodging triggers like too many kids, missing gear, or anything that could turn laughter into a full-blown meltdown. Add in the very real fear of injury (which, for Jonah, could be traumatic in ways he might carry for years), and “fun” starts to feel like a strategic operation.

But we did it. And it was fun… even if Jonah’s face looks unimpressed 😜We did not hit the tree (though I was convinced we would on every descent).

It’s been a really hard weekend for all of us, but this moment ended it on a happy note—and I’m grateful for that.

Fun parents? Maybe.
Tired parents in snow pants? Definitely.

#beautyinthereal
#specialneedsparenting

“You are such FUN parents!”

This comment came in recently, and my immediate thought was… well, that needs a little context.

Because the truth is, neither of us really wanted to go sledding today. But we’re Jonah’s only option for a fun life, and if we don’t make these moments happen, no one else will. So we layered up in snow gear, loaded the car, and went in search of adventure.

What that actually looks like is careful planning and a lot of mental gymnastics—dodging triggers like too many kids, missing gear, or anything that could turn laughter into a full-blown meltdown. Add in the very real fear of injury (which, for Jonah, could be traumatic in ways he might carry for years), and “fun” starts to feel like a strategic operation.

But we did it. And it was fun… even if Jonah’s face looks unimpressed 😜We did not hit the tree (though I was convinced we would on every descent).

It’s been a really hard weekend for all of us, but this moment ended it on a happy note—and I’m grateful for that.

Fun parents? Maybe.
Tired parents in snow pants? Definitely.

#beautyinthereal
#specialneedsparenting

The calendar may have turned to a new year, but it can feel like nothing has really changed. The same script plays on repeat, day after day, and the hope of change can feel risky—too fragile, too slippery to hold onto.

As a full-time, all-the-time caregiver to my adult autistic son, many days feel like Groundhog Day. Add in sleepless nights and a lack of outside support, and it quickly becomes a recipe for overwhelm.

So where do I take my weary heart when my circumstances are likely to remain the same for the foreseeable future?

I look backwards.

I look to all the ways God has carried me through the days, months, and years behind me. Not as a highlight reel of miraculous answers to prayers prayed through tears, but as a sacred remembering of how He has met me in every painful season. I can trace His good and gracious work in my heart—even when I longed for a different story for my life.

And it is in this remembering that my heart is convinced anew: He is still at work. He is still meeting me in the pain. That is the hope I carry into this new year—not the promise of a new script, but the assurance of the same faithful God walking with me through it.

“Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.”
—Lamentations 3:22–23

If you’re stepping into this year tired, disappointed, or holding a story you didn’t choose, you’re not alone. May you find just enough strength for today—and the quiet comfort of knowing God meets us right here.
#beautyinthereal

The calendar may have turned to a new year, but it can feel like nothing has really changed. The same script plays on repeat, day after day, and the hope of change can feel risky—too fragile, too slippery to hold onto.

As a full-time, all-the-time caregiver to my adult autistic son, many days feel like Groundhog Day. Add in sleepless nights and a lack of outside support, and it quickly becomes a recipe for overwhelm.

So where do I take my weary heart when my circumstances are likely to remain the same for the foreseeable future?

I look backwards.

I look to all the ways God has carried me through the days, months, and years behind me. Not as a highlight reel of miraculous answers to prayers prayed through tears, but as a sacred remembering of how He has met me in every painful season. I can trace His good and gracious work in my heart—even when I longed for a different story for my life.

And it is in this remembering that my heart is convinced anew: He is still at work. He is still meeting me in the pain. That is the hope I carry into this new year—not the promise of a new script, but the assurance of the same faithful God walking with me through it.

“Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.”
—Lamentations 3:22–23

If you’re stepping into this year tired, disappointed, or holding a story you didn’t choose, you’re not alone. May you find just enough strength for today—and the quiet comfort of knowing God meets us right here.
#beautyinthereal

Those elementary school songs sure come in handy when making plans for the new year! 🤣😍😜
#beautyinthereal

Those elementary school songs sure come in handy when making plans for the new year! 🤣😍😜
#beautyinthereal

I don’t know what your 2025 highlight reel looks like.
Maybe it’s a life others would envy… or maybe it requires just the right trending audio to help sell a story you wish felt more true.

For most of us, though, real life holds an ebb and flow—beauty woven into the mess, tears no one sees, and joy that doesn’t need likes or comments to settle deep into our souls.

For us, the year began with Jonah moving into a group home, where he lasted forty days and forty nights. I was honestly so relieved to have him back home. Since then, there were a few grand adventures to exotic locations—like Lincoln, Nebraska and Waukesha, Wisconsin. There was water and leaves and snow as the seasons turned. There were trials and victories, good friends, a new podcast, Christmas ornaments, and necklaces shipped around the world.

But more than anything, there was a steady thread of God’s faithfulness—woven through every high and every low. And we end this year more convinced than ever that nothing can separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord (Romans 8:35-39).

My greatest prayer is that you, too, would be convinced of this truth as you walk through the circumstances of your own life.

Happy New Year.
“It is no bad thing to celebrate a simple life.” — J.R.R. Tolkien ✨

I don’t know what your 2025 highlight reel looks like.
Maybe it’s a life others would envy… or maybe it requires just the right trending audio to help sell a story you wish felt more true.

For most of us, though, real life holds an ebb and flow—beauty woven into the mess, tears no one sees, and joy that doesn’t need likes or comments to settle deep into our souls.

For us, the year began with Jonah moving into a group home, where he lasted forty days and forty nights. I was honestly so relieved to have him back home. Since then, there were a few grand adventures to exotic locations—like Lincoln, Nebraska and Waukesha, Wisconsin. There was water and leaves and snow as the seasons turned. There were trials and victories, good friends, a new podcast, Christmas ornaments, and necklaces shipped around the world.

But more than anything, there was a steady thread of God’s faithfulness—woven through every high and every low. And we end this year more convinced than ever that nothing can separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord (Romans 8:35-39).

My greatest prayer is that you, too, would be convinced of this truth as you walk through the circumstances of your own life.

Happy New Year.
“It is no bad thing to celebrate a simple life.” — J.R.R. Tolkien ✨

Merry Christmas from our family to yours. Truly wishing you JOY in every season.
💛
#beautyinthereal

Merry Christmas from our family to yours. Truly wishing you JOY in every season.
💛
#beautyinthereal

Just saving this fun family memory right here… because when your sister majored in Theatre, every family gathering becomes a full-blown production 🎭✨

A few things you might be wondering:
• The table — yes, I bought it on FB Marketplace. Turns out it doubles as a very solid stage for workouts and impromptu dance numbers. Best money I ever spent.
• Jonah did not, in fact, drink the beer. Though he is 23 and if he wanted to, we’d allow it 😉 The empty bottle just makes an excellent microphone.
• Our Siri actually married a teacher and kisses him regularly, which is why she can sing this song with her whole devoted heart 🎶💋

Wishing you all a very Merry Un-Christmas 🎄
Not because we don’t celebrate the birth of Jesus—but because our traditions get a little… wonky on Jonah’s timeline.

#beautyinthereal

Just saving this fun family memory right here… because when your sister majored in Theatre, every family gathering becomes a full-blown production 🎭✨

A few things you might be wondering:
• The table — yes, I bought it on FB Marketplace. Turns out it doubles as a very solid stage for workouts and impromptu dance numbers. Best money I ever spent.
• Jonah did not, in fact, drink the beer. Though he is 23 and if he wanted to, we’d allow it 😉 The empty bottle just makes an excellent microphone.
• Our Siri actually married a teacher and kisses him regularly, which is why she can sing this song with her whole devoted heart 🎶💋

Wishing you all a very Merry Un-Christmas 🎄
Not because we don’t celebrate the birth of Jesus—but because our traditions get a little… wonky on Jonah’s timeline.

#beautyinthereal

I was having a hard morning. The combination of life circumstances and life cycle changes had my insides in a knot and my spirit spiraling into dark places of doubt and despair.

But I know the drill, and I know what pulls me out of it. So I put the worship music in my ear, got my body moving and focused on the words of truth as they blasted in my ear. Then I took my phone, the one I am trying to spend less time on... and walked around my house, taking photos of the things that make me smile and remind my heart of God’s faithfulness.

1. The water droplets glistening on my thriving Spider Plant
2.Shells that I collected on the shores of Japan over 30 years ago. I had sent them to my mother who saved them all these years and gave them back to me this past summer.
3. Then sings my soul... the sign in the sunroom that frames my view as I go about the day.
4. The December sun, low and soft in the sky, making it look like a sunset all day long as the evergreens have their moment.
5. A painting and a tiny clay pot, both reminders of beautiful women who are walking through their own tear filled days but holding on to Jesus in the midst of hard seasons.
6. Sweet tangerines that Jonah likes to press into juice.
7. A painting of Kaneohe Bay that hangs on my wall. I was 13 when we moved to Hawaii and into a house that had a view of these mountains. I was 15 when I got baptized in the turquoise waters that you see, just off Chinaman’s Hat.
8. The words that hang over my often unmade bed and remind me that God is forever faithful.
9. A photo that I took at sunrise in Maine. It seemed a perfect backdrop for these words that I need to hear every day so that I don’t lose my way on the hard days.

Each of these photos captures a reason for my heart to find gratitude today and I am sharing so that maybe you will be inspired to find the beauty in your own real life moments and messes. I would love to hear what yours are today.

I was having a hard morning. The combination of life circumstances and life cycle changes had my insides in a knot and my spirit spiraling into dark places of doubt and despair.

But I know the drill, and I know what pulls me out of it. So I put the worship music in my ear, got my body moving and focused on the words of truth as they blasted in my ear. Then I took my phone, the one I am trying to spend less time on... and walked around my house, taking photos of the things that make me smile and remind my heart of God’s faithfulness.

1. The water droplets glistening on my thriving Spider Plant
2.Shells that I collected on the shores of Japan over 30 years ago. I had sent them to my mother who saved them all these years and gave them back to me this past summer.
3. Then sings my soul... the sign in the sunroom that frames my view as I go about the day.
4. The December sun, low and soft in the sky, making it look like a sunset all day long as the evergreens have their moment.
5. A painting and a tiny clay pot, both reminders of beautiful women who are walking through their own tear filled days but holding on to Jesus in the midst of hard seasons.
6. Sweet tangerines that Jonah likes to press into juice.
7. A painting of Kaneohe Bay that hangs on my wall. I was 13 when we moved to Hawaii and into a house that had a view of these mountains. I was 15 when I got baptized in the turquoise waters that you see, just off Chinaman’s Hat.
8. The words that hang over my often unmade bed and remind me that God is forever faithful.
9. A photo that I took at sunrise in Maine. It seemed a perfect backdrop for these words that I need to hear every day so that I don’t lose my way on the hard days.

Each of these photos captures a reason for my heart to find gratitude today and I am sharing so that maybe you will be inspired to find the beauty in your own real life moments and messes. I would love to hear what yours are today.

Well, he said the same thing last year 😜 but still wanted to go this year so we will see what he actually decides for next year 🤣.

#beautyinthereal

Well, he said the same thing last year 😜 but still wanted to go this year so we will see what he actually decides for next year 🤣.

#beautyinthereal

That finger at the end is my favorite… but this is the way Jonah has to do the 12 Days of Christmas, he will borrow a couple extra fingers from whoever is in the vicinity 😍

#beautyinthereal

That finger at the end is my favorite… but this is the way Jonah has to do the 12 Days of Christmas, he will borrow a couple extra fingers from whoever is in the vicinity 😍

#beautyinthereal

Maybe your house sounds a lot like mine… loud.
And maybe it’s just as loud as the excuses in your head telling you not to move your one beautiful body today.

While Jonah’s script runs on repeat—over and over in his mind and right out of his mouth—mine tends to stay locked inside my head. Those thoughts get reinforced by the constant noise, the endless distractions, and a life that feels uncomfortable and exhausting. Everything in me is screaming for rest, not reps. Add in sleepless nights and everyone else’s needs, and suddenly being sedentary feels completely justified.

I’ve tried it that way. And honestly? It left me more tired, in more pain, and less equipped for the calling I’ve been given.

So, step by painful step, I climbed out of my excuse-filled hole and started finding my way back to energy and mobility. I don’t know what kind of pain your hole is filled with, and I can’t tell you what your step-by-step process should look like. I just want to encourage you to find your next step.

As a now 55-year-old woman, I can tell you with confidence—no matter your age—it’s never going to be easier than it is right now. You won’t magically find more time or energy in the next season. And if you’re a caregiver-mom carrying extra needs, it may actually get harder.

So start today. One push-up. A few stretches. A short walk.
Put the phone down, lift your eyes to the sun and the sky, and remember the Creator who fashioned you with purpose—and strength you’re still allowed to steward.

You’re worth the effort. 💛

#beautyinthereal

Maybe your house sounds a lot like mine… loud.
And maybe it’s just as loud as the excuses in your head telling you not to move your one beautiful body today.

While Jonah’s script runs on repeat—over and over in his mind and right out of his mouth—mine tends to stay locked inside my head. Those thoughts get reinforced by the constant noise, the endless distractions, and a life that feels uncomfortable and exhausting. Everything in me is screaming for rest, not reps. Add in sleepless nights and everyone else’s needs, and suddenly being sedentary feels completely justified.

I’ve tried it that way. And honestly? It left me more tired, in more pain, and less equipped for the calling I’ve been given.

So, step by painful step, I climbed out of my excuse-filled hole and started finding my way back to energy and mobility. I don’t know what kind of pain your hole is filled with, and I can’t tell you what your step-by-step process should look like. I just want to encourage you to find your next step.

As a now 55-year-old woman, I can tell you with confidence—no matter your age—it’s never going to be easier than it is right now. You won’t magically find more time or energy in the next season. And if you’re a caregiver-mom carrying extra needs, it may actually get harder.

So start today. One push-up. A few stretches. A short walk.
Put the phone down, lift your eyes to the sun and the sky, and remember the Creator who fashioned you with purpose—and strength you’re still allowed to steward.

You’re worth the effort. 💛

#beautyinthereal

A section of Christmas lights went out this afternoon, and in the upside-down world of our kind of Autism, that meant ALL the Christmas decorations had to come down. Immediately. ❄️✨ No questions, no hesitation, no “but it’s only December 11th!”—just poof, Christmas is DONE 🎄🚫

And honestly? I wasn’t even sad about it. Everything has been up since September 😅 and this mama has been “festive’d out” for weeks. But since a few questions always seem to come up, let me go ahead and answer them:

1. “Will this affect how presents are handled?”
NOPE. Jonah cancelled presents years ago. 🎁❌ The whole gift-opening thing made him anxious, so je declared that presents are JUNK. Our kids were older by then anyway, so now we just slip them some cash and call it a very Merry Minimalist Christmas. 💸🎄

2. “Does Jonah understand the calendar?”
YES—better than most ! 📅😂 He’s obsessed with dates. But understanding time doesn’t mean he plans to live by it. He makes up his own timelines… like the year he decided 2024 and 2025 were actually one giant mega-year. Or how he rearranged a birthdays to accommodate his own schedule of cake making.

3. “It seems like you let him control the whole house! Why can’t you just tell him NO?”
Oh friends… we tell him “no” ALL. THE. TIME. 🙃 The reality is that there are so many things in his life that he will never get to control. But he is a 23-year-old man with likes, dislikes, and opinions about his environment—and when we can honor them, we do. Choosing our battles keeps the peace for everyone. ✌️ And believe me… we have tried it the other way. No one was happy. Not even a little.

So HAPPY NEW YEAR… at least until that get cancelled too 😜

#beautyinthereal

A section of Christmas lights went out this afternoon, and in the upside-down world of our kind of Autism, that meant ALL the Christmas decorations had to come down. Immediately. ❄️✨ No questions, no hesitation, no “but it’s only December 11th!”—just poof, Christmas is DONE 🎄🚫

And honestly? I wasn’t even sad about it. Everything has been up since September 😅 and this mama has been “festive’d out” for weeks. But since a few questions always seem to come up, let me go ahead and answer them:

1. “Will this affect how presents are handled?”
NOPE. Jonah cancelled presents years ago. 🎁❌ The whole gift-opening thing made him anxious, so je declared that presents are JUNK. Our kids were older by then anyway, so now we just slip them some cash and call it a very Merry Minimalist Christmas. 💸🎄

2. “Does Jonah understand the calendar?”
YES—better than most ! 📅😂 He’s obsessed with dates. But understanding time doesn’t mean he plans to live by it. He makes up his own timelines… like the year he decided 2024 and 2025 were actually one giant mega-year. Or how he rearranged a birthdays to accommodate his own schedule of cake making.

3. “It seems like you let him control the whole house! Why can’t you just tell him NO?”
Oh friends… we tell him “no” ALL. THE. TIME. 🙃 The reality is that there are so many things in his life that he will never get to control. But he is a 23-year-old man with likes, dislikes, and opinions about his environment—and when we can honor them, we do. Choosing our battles keeps the peace for everyone. ✌️ And believe me… we have tried it the other way. No one was happy. Not even a little.

So HAPPY NEW YEAR… at least until that get cancelled too 😜

#beautyinthereal

A clip from our holiday episode of The Beauty In The Real Podcast… and the reminder that Jesus meets us right here in the middle of our moments, messes an meltdowns….

#beautyinthereal

A clip from our holiday episode of The Beauty In The Real Podcast… and the reminder that Jesus meets us right here in the middle of our moments, messes an meltdowns….

#beautyinthereal

Well, I thought it was GLORIOUS! And he got some exercise so we are going to call it a win! 😜🤣💛

Well, I thought it was GLORIOUS! And he got some exercise so we are going to call it a win! 😜🤣💛

November, I actually think it is one of the prettiest months of the year. Something about the soft muted color palate and the sunlight that hangs low in the sky, it makes it look like a gentle sunset all day long. The days were long… but beauty showed up in the every day “real” and I am thankful for family and anniversaries and the lights in the sky and the colors on the trees and stollen moments of stillness
What were you thankful for in November?

November, I actually think it is one of the prettiest months of the year. Something about the soft muted color palate and the sunlight that hangs low in the sky, it makes it look like a gentle sunset all day long. The days were long… but beauty showed up in the every day “real” and I am thankful for family and anniversaries and the lights in the sky and the colors on the trees and stollen moments of stillness
What were you thankful for in November?

Happy Birthday to The Mom, The Myth, The Legend! She has been an unforgettable force since the day she was born over 8 decades ago and the hands of God have never let her go. She has shaped me in ways that God is using for our good and his glory and I am so thankful for her. Happy Birthday Mom!

Scroll to the end for a trip down memory lane 💛
@u_r_joy

Happy Birthday to The Mom, The Myth, The Legend! She has been an unforgettable force since the day she was born over 8 decades ago and the hands of God have never let her go. She has shaped me in ways that God is using for our good and his glory and I am so thankful for her. Happy Birthday Mom!

Scroll to the end for a trip down memory lane 💛
@u_r_joy

This is what the hard days look like...
When the stress of caregiving and the constant needs and noise starts to rise like a wave of anxiety in my heart until I am holding in the silent scream and the unshed tears, stuffing them down into deep places that only God can see.... That is when I remember to run to him. To raise a hallelujah from the ashes. It only takes a moment, one song blasting in my ears and in my heart as I mouth the words of truth that transforms my heart, even when the circumstances don’t change.

If you find yourself in the same hard place, try lifting a song of praise to God who never leaves us or forsakes us but promises to meet us in the dark places with the light of his presence.

#beautyinthereal

This is what the hard days look like...
When the stress of caregiving and the constant needs and noise starts to rise like a wave of anxiety in my heart until I am holding in the silent scream and the unshed tears, stuffing them down into deep places that only God can see.... That is when I remember to run to him. To raise a hallelujah from the ashes. It only takes a moment, one song blasting in my ears and in my heart as I mouth the words of truth that transforms my heart, even when the circumstances don’t change.

If you find yourself in the same hard place, try lifting a song of praise to God who never leaves us or forsakes us but promises to meet us in the dark places with the light of his presence.

#beautyinthereal

“Chin Puppets” have become a tradition in our crazy house and Jonah always picks this song. I love how he loves it and laughs at himself!

Do it with your kids! It will be so fun.
#beautyinthereal

“Chin Puppets” have become a tradition in our crazy house and Jonah always picks this song. I love how he loves it and laughs at himself!

Do it with your kids! It will be so fun.
#beautyinthereal

Life without trending audio can be really really loud 😜
If your house sounds like this… you are my people. And if you long for the day that your house sounds like this… I see you too 😘🙏🏻

The spectrum is wide and our days can be a crazy mixture of hoping for words and longing for quiet all at the same time.

(Ps. The BUS is not here for him 😩)

#beautyinthereal

Life without trending audio can be really really loud 😜
If your house sounds like this… you are my people. And if you long for the day that your house sounds like this… I see you too 😘🙏🏻

The spectrum is wide and our days can be a crazy mixture of hoping for words and longing for quiet all at the same time.

(Ps. The BUS is not here for him 😩)

#beautyinthereal

Episode 8 will be out soon and it’s my favorite yet! Samantha and I talked about the joys and the honest struggles of the holiday season and how to navigate the chaos, the cookies and the family dynamics! Keep an eye out and follow Beauty In The Real Podcast on Apple, Spotify & YouTube.

#beautyinthereal

Episode 8 will be out soon and it’s my favorite yet! Samantha and I talked about the joys and the honest struggles of the holiday season and how to navigate the chaos, the cookies and the family dynamics! Keep an eye out and follow Beauty In The Real Podcast on Apple, Spotify & YouTube.

#beautyinthereal

Somebody call @veggietalesofficial and tell them we need a refresher course… well, that and some “frozen toilet paper” 😆

Leaving this here, mostly for me… I doubt that anyone else will be amused for the whole 3 minutes but on the hard days, I will watch this back and it will make me smile! Hope all you Instagram Aunties get a smile out of it too!

#beautyinthereal
#madamblueberry #veggietales

Somebody call @veggietalesofficial and tell them we need a refresher course… well, that and some “frozen toilet paper” 😆

Leaving this here, mostly for me… I doubt that anyone else will be amused for the whole 3 minutes but on the hard days, I will watch this back and it will make me smile! Hope all you Instagram Aunties get a smile out of it too!

#beautyinthereal
#madamblueberry #veggietales

Had some spicy moments today but time outside, with a little work and a lot of prayer and we are doing better now. #beautyinthereal

Had some spicy moments today but time outside, with a little work and a lot of prayer and we are doing better now. #beautyinthereal

Supplements, seasons and support! Live Q&A 💛

Supplements, seasons and support! Live Q&A 💛

Northern Lights…. Filipino Style 🤣

#beautyinthereal

Northern Lights…. Filipino Style 🤣

#beautyinthereal

“How do you prioritize your marriage?”

A special-needs mom slid this question into my DMs, sharing how her marriage was struggling. My honest reply: “We don’t always.”

Today is our 28th anniversary. Our last date night? Our 27th anniversary. The truth is, our son’s needs often have to come before our relationship.

Is that ideal? No. But it’s reality for many of us living in a daily battle zone with no relief in sight. We slip into “caregiving co-workers,” passing the baton back and forth just to survive and care for everyone else. Conversations get shelved because even talking can trigger a meltdown. Conflicts go unresolved because there’s never a good time to deal with them.

Marriage is hard even in the best circumstances—and we’re not in the best circumstances. So what do we do?

We fix our eyes on something greater than our marriage or even our love for each other.
We cling to God’s promise:
“My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” (2 Corinthians 12:9)

And friends—we are weak. Our marriage has walked through deep valleys. Our love story is not a fairy tale. It’s required sacrifices we never would have chosen.

But 28 years ago, we made a covenant before God. We said “I do,” and we keep saying it—on the mountains, in the valleys, and in the messy middle. We rely on grace freely given, and we try to pour that same grace on each other. Some days we fail miserably. But we keep trying again.

If this sounds nothing like your life, and you struggle to understand our choices—I’m genuinely glad for you. I’m thankful your path is easier.

But if you do relate… you are my people. I see you. And I pray that God’s power is made perfect in the beautiful, exhausting, holy mess we call life.

#beautyinthereal #autismfamily

“How do you prioritize your marriage?”

A special-needs mom slid this question into my DMs, sharing how her marriage was struggling. My honest reply: “We don’t always.”

Today is our 28th anniversary. Our last date night? Our 27th anniversary. The truth is, our son’s needs often have to come before our relationship.

Is that ideal? No. But it’s reality for many of us living in a daily battle zone with no relief in sight. We slip into “caregiving co-workers,” passing the baton back and forth just to survive and care for everyone else. Conversations get shelved because even talking can trigger a meltdown. Conflicts go unresolved because there’s never a good time to deal with them.

Marriage is hard even in the best circumstances—and we’re not in the best circumstances. So what do we do?

We fix our eyes on something greater than our marriage or even our love for each other.
We cling to God’s promise:
“My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” (2 Corinthians 12:9)

And friends—we are weak. Our marriage has walked through deep valleys. Our love story is not a fairy tale. It’s required sacrifices we never would have chosen.

But 28 years ago, we made a covenant before God. We said “I do,” and we keep saying it—on the mountains, in the valleys, and in the messy middle. We rely on grace freely given, and we try to pour that same grace on each other. Some days we fail miserably. But we keep trying again.

If this sounds nothing like your life, and you struggle to understand our choices—I’m genuinely glad for you. I’m thankful your path is easier.

But if you do relate… you are my people. I see you. And I pray that God’s power is made perfect in the beautiful, exhausting, holy mess we call life.

#beautyinthereal #autismfamily

Sometimes he gives himself a good Bible Verse pep talk… and other times is more of a practical, real life, immediately applicable kind of self talk 🤣
He said this movie line over and over and over and both his therapist and I were happy that he took his own advice !

#beautyinthereal

Sometimes he gives himself a good Bible Verse pep talk… and other times is more of a practical, real life, immediately applicable kind of self talk 🤣
He said this movie line over and over and over and both his therapist and I were happy that he took his own advice !

#beautyinthereal

Finding a way to fill the days with meaningful activities is one of the greatest challenges we have right now. So when we noticed our neighbor and owner of the Golf Course working near our house, clearing out a year’s worth of pine needles, we went out to see if it would be ok to help.

For the next two hours we raked up the pines and loaded them into the cart to drive them to an area where they could be spread out as ground cover for the winter. We worked and laughed and took 5 hay-ride style runs to the other side of the course.

At the end of it, I am not sure who was more grateful, Our sweet friend who said that we were God’s gift to her today, or this mama who desperately needed her boy to get outside, move his body and experience a tiny piece of community.

I guess we were all blessed!

She has a whole other section that needs the same work done so hoping we can make this a habit!

#beautyinthereal #caregiving

Finding a way to fill the days with meaningful activities is one of the greatest challenges we have right now. So when we noticed our neighbor and owner of the Golf Course working near our house, clearing out a year’s worth of pine needles, we went out to see if it would be ok to help.

For the next two hours we raked up the pines and loaded them into the cart to drive them to an area where they could be spread out as ground cover for the winter. We worked and laughed and took 5 hay-ride style runs to the other side of the course.

At the end of it, I am not sure who was more grateful, Our sweet friend who said that we were God’s gift to her today, or this mama who desperately needed her boy to get outside, move his body and experience a tiny piece of community.

I guess we were all blessed!

She has a whole other section that needs the same work done so hoping we can make this a habit!

#beautyinthereal #caregiving

A clip from our new podcast where I shared a small part of my faith Journey.

Beauty In The Real Podcast is available on Spotify, YouTube & Apple Podcasts.

#beautyinthereal

A clip from our new podcast where I shared a small part of my faith Journey.

Beauty In The Real Podcast is available on Spotify, YouTube & Apple Podcasts.

#beautyinthereal

I know that sometimes God’s plans don’t always feel good to us but we can trust that his promises are true and that in all things and at all time, he is working them out for our good and for the glory of his kingdom.
Thanks Jonah, we all need that reminder sometimes.

#beautyinthereal

I know that sometimes God’s plans don’t always feel good to us but we can trust that his promises are true and that in all things and at all time, he is working them out for our good and for the glory of his kingdom.
Thanks Jonah, we all need that reminder sometimes.

#beautyinthereal

“I’m so glad to live in a world where there are Octobers”
~Anne of Green Gables~

October recap:
Leaves, Lake Cabin cut short, family photos, more leaves, new necklace, new podcast, lots of stress and a few slow moments in between. 💛

#beautyinthereal

“I’m so glad to live in a world where there are Octobers”
~Anne of Green Gables~

October recap:
Leaves, Lake Cabin cut short, family photos, more leaves, new necklace, new podcast, lots of stress and a few slow moments in between. 💛

#beautyinthereal

I love how Jonah gives himself a good Bible pep talk to get him through the chores! Something we can all learn from this amazing young man!

#beautyinthereal #autisticadult

I love how Jonah gives himself a good Bible pep talk to get him through the chores! Something we can all learn from this amazing young man!

#beautyinthereal #autisticadult

This was a Marco Polo to a friend… and I am sharing it here in case it makes even one of you feel less alone. I am slightly embarrassed about how many times I said “hate” 😳 cause I promise I am not a hateful person 😜 but this was the raw moment and how I was feeling. If you can relate, you are my people 😘

#beautyinthereal #specialneedsmom #sometimesautismlookslikethis

This was a Marco Polo to a friend… and I am sharing it here in case it makes even one of you feel less alone. I am slightly embarrassed about how many times I said “hate” 😳 cause I promise I am not a hateful person 😜 but this was the raw moment and how I was feeling. If you can relate, you are my people 😘

#beautyinthereal #specialneedsmom #sometimesautismlookslikethis

That “Middle Age Mom” thing may mean we have some hard earned wisdom but it also means the technical side of podcasting and social media has us at a slight disadvantage 😜
But we are learning ad we go and we hope you will come along for the ride!

We have our first 4 episodes available now on Apple, Spotify & YouTube. (I have a “podcast” highlight bubble with all the links)

I am so blessed and amazed that you all want me to talk MORE 😜 and I am so thankful for my Bestie who agreed to take me from boring monologues to rich conversations.
Love you @honestly_samantha0

That “Middle Age Mom” thing may mean we have some hard earned wisdom but it also means the technical side of podcasting and social media has us at a slight disadvantage 😜
But we are learning ad we go and we hope you will come along for the ride!

We have our first 4 episodes available now on Apple, Spotify & YouTube. (I have a “podcast” highlight bubble with all the links)

I am so blessed and amazed that you all want me to talk MORE 😜 and I am so thankful for my Bestie who agreed to take me from boring monologues to rich conversations.
Love you @honestly_samantha0

Demolition has always been his favorite but the question of whether or not to include him in it has always been a struggle to answer… Do I want him to know that sawing things off of the house is an option? 😳 But his excitement in being involved always wins me over…. I will definitely be hiding this saw when we are done here and save the power tools for when he isn’t around 😜

But getting rid of these little spindly toppers is a win!!! 😍

#beautyinthereal #specialneedsfamily

Demolition has always been his favorite but the question of whether or not to include him in it has always been a struggle to answer… Do I want him to know that sawing things off of the house is an option? 😳 But his excitement in being involved always wins me over…. I will definitely be hiding this saw when we are done here and save the power tools for when he isn’t around 😜

But getting rid of these little spindly toppers is a win!!! 😍

#beautyinthereal #specialneedsfamily

We’ve already had this conversation a dozen times today and then he wanted to make a video of it! 😆

Jonah never slept through the night until he was about 15. And then it the “dark days” (2020-2023) none of us slept much. So much anxiety and destruction would happen in the nighttime hours and it was pretty stressful.

But the last 2 years have been much better and Jonah usually sleeps well. But there are some nights that he doesn’t and we understand that it isn’t his fault and it’s just something we have to work through. I actually love that he thinks it’s funny 😄

I’m off for another round of coffee now 😜
What does sleep look like in your house? 👇🏻

We’ve already had this conversation a dozen times today and then he wanted to make a video of it! 😆

Jonah never slept through the night until he was about 15. And then it the “dark days” (2020-2023) none of us slept much. So much anxiety and destruction would happen in the nighttime hours and it was pretty stressful.

But the last 2 years have been much better and Jonah usually sleeps well. But there are some nights that he doesn’t and we understand that it isn’t his fault and it’s just something we have to work through. I actually love that he thinks it’s funny 😄

I’m off for another round of coffee now 😜
What does sleep look like in your house? 👇🏻

#beautyinthereal

#beautyinthereal

Just going to leave this here 😳

#beautyinthereal

Just going to leave this here 😳

#beautyinthereal

Sometimes autism parenting looks like this.

And if you still live an experience where you have “control” over all your kid’s behaviors and think that if I did it your way then everything would be better… I am sincerely happy for you. I’ve been there and I hope you get to stay there forever. But if things change, let’s talk then. 😘

#beautyinthereal

Sometimes autism parenting looks like this.

And if you still live an experience where you have “control” over all your kid’s behaviors and think that if I did it your way then everything would be better… I am sincerely happy for you. I’ve been there and I hope you get to stay there forever. But if things change, let’s talk then. 😘

#beautyinthereal

“STOP TALKING PLEASE”
It’s a phrase that we hear dozens of times a day and it may be what your kid is thinking, even if they don’t have words to say it.

Jonah isn’t able to elaborate on why conversations are difficult for him to listen to, but there are patterns and we have theories.

It seems that he often has a script running in his brain, sometimes silently and sometimes out loud, but when others talk, it seems to interrupt his thoughts and makes him dysregulated.

We did teach him the importance of asking politely, hence the “please”, and when he does ask, we feel it is important to honor his words when we can. Consequently, we spend a lot of time in silence and that can be hard.

Sometimes we will push back gently and tell him that we need to finish a conversation or exchange information and he is learning a small amount of tolerance but it is a give and take and right now we have to give a lot more than we take.

I try to remember how hard we have all worked for him to have a voice and how frustrating it must be for him to live in a world that is so loud that he can’t hear himself think.

#beautyinthereal #sometimesautismlookslikethis #specialneedsmom #sensoryoverload

“STOP TALKING PLEASE”
It’s a phrase that we hear dozens of times a day and it may be what your kid is thinking, even if they don’t have words to say it.

Jonah isn’t able to elaborate on why conversations are difficult for him to listen to, but there are patterns and we have theories.

It seems that he often has a script running in his brain, sometimes silently and sometimes out loud, but when others talk, it seems to interrupt his thoughts and makes him dysregulated.

We did teach him the importance of asking politely, hence the “please”, and when he does ask, we feel it is important to honor his words when we can. Consequently, we spend a lot of time in silence and that can be hard.

Sometimes we will push back gently and tell him that we need to finish a conversation or exchange information and he is learning a small amount of tolerance but it is a give and take and right now we have to give a lot more than we take.

I try to remember how hard we have all worked for him to have a voice and how frustrating it must be for him to live in a world that is so loud that he can’t hear himself think.

#beautyinthereal #sometimesautismlookslikethis #specialneedsmom #sensoryoverload

Well, his name is Jonah, but otherwise it works 😆

Thanks Siri 😘

#beautyinthereal #specialneedsparenting #autismparents #specialneedsmom #caregivers

Well, his name is Jonah, but otherwise it works 😆

Thanks Siri 😘

#beautyinthereal #specialneedsparenting #autismparents #specialneedsmom #caregivers

Some Bible truth for you today!
#beautyinthereal

Some Bible truth for you today!
#beautyinthereal

He’s our third wheel, our plus one, our forever boy...
Our son Jonah is 23, autistic and will need 24/7 care and supervision for the rest of his life. At the moment there is no day program or support staff to be found that meets his unique needs and so he is with one or both of us at all times.

This week, we rented a lake cabin and the three of us headed off on a little adventure. It was fun until it wasn’t and we came home a day early but not before making this fun reel. We are reminded that 2 things can be true at once... We can love our boy and also wish we had a break.

In 28 years of marriage we have spent a grand total of 4 nights where we left our kids. It may not be everyone’s story but it is ours. If this sounds crazy to you... maybe just take a moment and be thankful that you live a life where this could only be crazy... or satire...

But I do hope it made you laugh, and if you can relate, just know that you are not alone!

#beautyinthereal

He’s our third wheel, our plus one, our forever boy...
Our son Jonah is 23, autistic and will need 24/7 care and supervision for the rest of his life. At the moment there is no day program or support staff to be found that meets his unique needs and so he is with one or both of us at all times.

This week, we rented a lake cabin and the three of us headed off on a little adventure. It was fun until it wasn’t and we came home a day early but not before making this fun reel. We are reminded that 2 things can be true at once... We can love our boy and also wish we had a break.

In 28 years of marriage we have spent a grand total of 4 nights where we left our kids. It may not be everyone’s story but it is ours. If this sounds crazy to you... maybe just take a moment and be thankful that you live a life where this could only be crazy... or satire...

But I do hope it made you laugh, and if you can relate, just know that you are not alone!

#beautyinthereal

#sometimesautismlookslikethis
I keep reminding myself how far we’ve come and how he is so much calmer and happier than he was a few years ago…. While also acknowledging the fast that this is hard! #beautyinthereal

#sometimesautismlookslikethis
I keep reminding myself how far we’ve come and how he is so much calmer and happier than he was a few years ago…. While also acknowledging the fast that this is hard! #beautyinthereal

No man knows the day or the hour but if Jonah could pick, Jesus would be coming back in the summer of 2055.
This is a topic that he thinks about often and likes to talk about… it reminds me that we should all long for Jesus the way that Jonah does and live everyday in eager expectation. #comelordjesus #beautyinthereal

No man knows the day or the hour but if Jonah could pick, Jesus would be coming back in the summer of 2055.
This is a topic that he thinks about often and likes to talk about… it reminds me that we should all long for Jesus the way that Jonah does and live everyday in eager expectation. #comelordjesus #beautyinthereal

Many of you have asked me to explain what “scripting” is for Jonah. This clip should give you a better idea. Sometimes he will do it with an actual video and sometimes just in his head but it is almost always an episode of something that is stuck in his head and it can take him hours to to get through a 20 minute episode. If he gets interrupted he may have to start over from the beginning. If we talk too much or make too much noise while he is scripting he can get very agitated and need to start over. And he can’t just abandon a script in the middle. He must finish it. And the volume can be pretty intense!!! When he has these days where the compulsion to script is strong, it can make for very hard days. But scripting is also how he learned to recite so many Bible verses and I do love that! 😍🥹😳😆😜
#beautyinthereal

Many of you have asked me to explain what “scripting” is for Jonah. This clip should give you a better idea. Sometimes he will do it with an actual video and sometimes just in his head but it is almost always an episode of something that is stuck in his head and it can take him hours to to get through a 20 minute episode. If he gets interrupted he may have to start over from the beginning. If we talk too much or make too much noise while he is scripting he can get very agitated and need to start over. And he can’t just abandon a script in the middle. He must finish it. And the volume can be pretty intense!!! When he has these days where the compulsion to script is strong, it can make for very hard days. But scripting is also how he learned to recite so many Bible verses and I do love that! 😍🥹😳😆😜
#beautyinthereal

21 years ago, my son was diagnosed with severe autism. Since then, our story has carried us through some dark and frightening chapters. Yet in the midst of it all, here’s what I’ve learned:

1️⃣Heartache may undo us for a time, but it also remakes us. It stretches our capacity for love, compassion, and selflessness—and those are treasures worth holding.

2️⃣Two things can be true at once. I can love my son with all my heart, knowing he has immeasurable worth exactly as he is, while also working tirelessly to help him grow, learn, and heal so that he may live the fullest life possible.

3️⃣Philippians 4:7 promises a “peace that surpasses understanding.” I’ve found that peace most often in circumstances I cannot understand. Surrendering the “why” has taught me to trust the God who holds us in His all-powerful hands—the One who works all things together for our good and for the glory of His plan.

Come follow along for faith filled encouragement for your own caregiving journey…. And tell us… what have you learned? 👇🏻

#beautyinthereal

21 years ago, my son was diagnosed with severe autism. Since then, our story has carried us through some dark and frightening chapters. Yet in the midst of it all, here’s what I’ve learned:

1️⃣Heartache may undo us for a time, but it also remakes us. It stretches our capacity for love, compassion, and selflessness—and those are treasures worth holding.

2️⃣Two things can be true at once. I can love my son with all my heart, knowing he has immeasurable worth exactly as he is, while also working tirelessly to help him grow, learn, and heal so that he may live the fullest life possible.

3️⃣Philippians 4:7 promises a “peace that surpasses understanding.” I’ve found that peace most often in circumstances I cannot understand. Surrendering the “why” has taught me to trust the God who holds us in His all-powerful hands—the One who works all things together for our good and for the glory of His plan.

Come follow along for faith filled encouragement for your own caregiving journey…. And tell us… what have you learned? 👇🏻

#beautyinthereal

Health and wellness for the overwhelmed caregiver and how I am navigating that in my own life.

Health and wellness for the overwhelmed caregiver and how I am navigating that in my own life.

September…. And all that that implies 😍
#jesusisontheway 😆

September…. And all that that implies 😍
#jesusisontheway 😆

As a full time caregiver for my adult son… a day out with my other kids is a rare a beautiful dream come true. Saving this one so I can look back and smile whenever I need to. 😍
Also… she thinks my wrinkles are so pretty and that moment will live in my aging heart forever!

#beautyinthereal

As a full time caregiver for my adult son… a day out with my other kids is a rare a beautiful dream come true. Saving this one so I can look back and smile whenever I need to. 😍
Also… she thinks my wrinkles are so pretty and that moment will live in my aging heart forever!

#beautyinthereal

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