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Beauty In The Real

This little tradition is one of the most beautiful expressions of love that I have ever known. If it has touched your heart too, comment LUNCH and I will send you the link to pitch in for their next Sunday meal!

#beautyinthereal

Happy Fathers Day to my amazing father who is still showing up even though he is slowing down. The steadiness in which he loves and serves is an inspiration to many.

It was so fun to surprise him with a Father’s Day visit today! Love you Dad.

#beautyinthereal

If you are looking for a faith based, Jesus centered discussion on marriage and the intersection of special needs parenting, we’ve got an honest take on what we got wrong and what we learned in the process.
Available on Apple, Spotify and a YouTube.
I can message you with the one want but it’s not an automatic reply so be patient… or find on my page.

#beautyinthereal

Summer Struggles and finding healthy rhythms with our special needs kiddos.

Hope this encourages you!
❤️, R….. 🤣

We sat in a booth at a very un-romantic chain diner yesterday and talked about recording a podcast on the intersection of marriage and special-needs parenting. A lot of memories rose to the surface. There were new insights and a few tears as we looked back on some of the hard years with that ever-elusive gift of hindsight.

Our marriage has not always been easy.

In fact, there have been seasons that felt downright awful.

But after 30 years together, we’ve learned a few things, and it’s time to share some of those painful lessons with you.

We got a lot of things wrong, so this isn’t going to be a “look how great we are” kind of message. It’s more of a “here’s what we learned in the middle of the mess,” with a heaping dose of “God’s grace is sufficient for us” on top.

As we pray and prepare, I’d love to hear any specific questions or topics that might speak directly to your current struggles. If you don’t feel comfortable sharing them in the comments, send me a DM.

#beautyinthereal

Everyday we consult Jonah and make a list of the daily activities. We have found it to be a game changer for his day! Try it with your kiddos this summer. A little structure and a little managing expectations can go a long way!

What habits are helping you and your family manage the expanse of summer free time? 👇🏻

#beautyinthereal

Hello. I’m Rohnda, and yes, my name is actually spelled like that... Thanks Mom & Dad.
Also, my head is chopped off and there is an eye missing in this photo. My face is scrunched up in a way that makes my jowl wrinkles show themselves but that is what a smirky smile will do to a 56 year old face and I am here for it!

I was at a women’s event at church and the sense of community was beautiful. I’ve got diet coke in my big cup and my daughter was there taking some photos and everything about it made me happy.

That ring on my finger is one that I made a few years ago and I have worn it ever since. (you can zoom in to get a better look) I called it “pressed” because Jonah and I hammered it out flat and because it reminds me of the verse from 2nd Corinthians 4 that reminds us that we are “Pressed down but not destroyed.”

Maybe you need that reminder too...

But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed.
2 Corinthians 4:7-9

I pray that you find peace in your current pressing and that you find a strength in it that can only come from God’s all surpassing power!

#beautyinthereal

What’s your favorite kind of music?
Jonah has a wide variety of music tastes but I love that he loves it!

#beautyinthereal

Jonah likes to pick the music. He goes through phases that can be anywhere from 80 pop to traditional hymns. But when we sat on the porch as the sun filtered through the tress, he played this song over and over. And every time he got to this part, to these words, he would throw his hands up high and turn toward the sun. I don’t know what was going through his mind but his worship is beautiful and I think God, who sees the heart, was smiling at our precious boy!

#beautyinthereal

To the parents of this year’s Autistic Graduates:

Five years ago, I sat in a high school gym and watched my autistic son walk across the stage in a bright red cap and gown.

The tears rolling down my cheeks weren’t the same as the ones I saw around me.

Parents nearby talked about college plans, empty nests, and the exciting future ahead. But for families like ours, graduation often comes with a different set of emotions.

We aren’t just celebrating a milestone. We’re saying goodbye to years of support, structure, therapies, IEPs, teachers, and staff who helped carry us through.

I grieved the loss of that community and wondered what would come next.

Five years later, I can tell you this:

The road hasn’t been easy.

We’ve experienced setbacks, sleepless nights, heartbreak, and seasons that felt impossibly hard.

But we’ve also watched Jonah grow in ways we never expected.

And through it all, we’ve learned three important lessons:

1️⃣ God is faithful through every season.
Not always on our timeline or in the ways we expect, but He never leaves us.

2️⃣ Our kids have a voice.
Behavior communicates. Resistance communicates. Preferences communicate. Sometimes the greatest growth happens when we stop asking how our child can fit the situation and start asking what they’re trying to tell us.

3️⃣ None of us are finished becoming.
Our children are still growing and learning. So are we. God is using every challenge, every victory, and every unexpected turn to shape all of us into who He created us to be.

If your autistic child is graduating this week, know this:

Graduation is not the end of the story.

It’s simply the beginning of a new chapter.

And God is still at work.

Full blog post with our journey and deeper encouragement is available on my website.
#beautyinthereal

Slide number 3 is my favorite!

If your brain is craving some peace and quiet, maybe you should try this with me next weekend!

It might just be the reset that your nervous system needs as well!

#beautyinthereal #screentimelimits #lowtech

Ornaments are not just for Christmas and this is the reminder I need all year long. It helps me to think about a purpose that goes beyond my circumstances today. If you need this reminder too, I made them just for you. They are listed on my website.

#beautyinthereal

If you are tired today and feel like you are at a low capacity… I have the most amazing news for you…

#beautyinthereal

There was a season when this page was mostly about the hard parts of caregiving. We called it the Dark Days, and it wasn’t the superpower side of autism.
It was sleepless nights, violence, property destruction, and the fear that things might never change.

And if you’ve been here since then, thank you. You walked with us through some very difficult years, and it meant so much to know that sharing our real-life messes and meltdowns helped you feel seen.

But seasons change.
And when God changes a season, He often changes the assignment too.
Autism will always be part of our story.Jonah will always be part of our story. And let’s be honest... the Instagram aunties would stage a peaceful protest if he disappeared.
But this page is growing into something broader.

You’ll still find faith here. Not the polished, picture-perfect kind. The real kind. The kind that applies Scripture to hard days and sleepless nights, to therapy appointments, caregiver burnout, and everyday life.

You’ll still see Jonah.
You’ll also see some of my favorite things. The products I buy with my own money or create with my own hands.
And I promise to share only the things we actually use and truly love.

You’ll see everyday life content too.
Fitness for caregivers who are tired but know they need to be strong.

Thrifting and style for normal people with normal budgets. And the small things that make life a little easier and a little more beautiful.

This space will always be about faith in a Good God, even in the midst of a life that can be hard. It will always be about finding beauty in our real life moments, messes & meltdowns.

So come along for the ride, or go in peace… 😘
💛R~

#beautyinthereal

Who else needs to start again???

3 years ago I couldn’t do a single push up. On my 56th birthday this year I did 56 push-ups and then some... but I have fallen off the wagon over the last couple months and It’s time to get back on! No matter who you are, but especially if you are a caregiver, getting strong and staying strong matters more than we realize. So start where you are, use what you have, do what you can!

(P.S. I am not a fitness expert and my form probably needs some work so I am not here to tell you how to do it, just want to inspire you to keep trying, There are people we love who need us to take care of ourselves!)

My heart is so happy! We did it and it was so much fun!

After a few years of not being willing to go into public places, the tides are turning and the world seems to be opening up again.

I am so thankful!

#beautyinthereal #autism

Today’s adventure took is to the Mall of America in Minnesota. Jonah had a great time. Here are a few things they helped it be a successful outing. 👇🏻

1. The Disability Pass: this gives us special access as well as money saving perks since his attendant can ride for free.

2. Family Restrooms: Every bathroom area included a family restroom which is very important for us. When they are not available, I opt to take him into the Women’s Restroom with me but I avoid that whenever possible.

3. We researched ahead of time and discovered that Monday from 10am to noon is the least crowded time to go.

4. Sensory Room: it was closed for maintenance today so I wasn’t able to show you but it is a great option if you need a quiet break.

Have you gone on outings where there was special accommodation for your kiddos? Tell us about it 👇🏻

#beautyinthereal

Get out there and go for a walk. Do it for your physical health and for your mental wellbeing. Nothing puts Jonah in a better mood than a good long walk… unless there are dragonflies 😳😜🤣 #iykyk
#beautyinthereal

My recent conversation with Beth Lawrence will be an encouragement to you, no matter which season of caregiving you are in.

We talked about the tension of wanting to pursue our gifts and calling while also balancing the seasons of caregiving.

(Sorry, IG won’t let me put captions on this one 😜). Links to full episodes are available in my bio.

#beautyinthereal

Happy 100th birthday to my sweet & spicy Mother In Law!

She has lived a loooong and beautiful life and it deserves a permanent place on my feed!

Her earth side days are waning so this milestone birthday is a gift from her Creator who may soon call her home where she will hear “well done my good and faithful servant”. She has long placed her faith in Jesus and so her future is secure.

Wish we could be there to celebrate in Hawaiian Style 🤙🏼 But we are celebrating all the memories as well as enjoying some cheesecake in her honor!!!

#beautyinthereal

New Podcast episode is available on THE BEAUTY IN THE REAL podcast. Available on Apple, Spotify & YouTube.

In this episode we talk about the tension of pursuing our giftings and callings while in a hard season of caregiving. I think you will be encouraged.

If you listen, I would love to hear how it blessed you!

April Outings, Outfits and Outburst...
Our days look a lot like the crazy swings of spring weather.
Sometimes it’s a cute outfit and in the next moment it’s an outburst worthy of netflix documentary... (Which, by the way, I still have no new update for)

But we keep getting up everyday and finding those new mercies ready and available and we keep getting dressed and putting on love and we keep going out and walking in the strength that we can only find in Jesus!

I don’t know what your days look like right now, but I can promise you that it has been assigned to you and there is a great and beautiful purpose in it.

Tell me, how can I be praying for you in May?

Love, R~ #beautyinthereal

A few years ago, Jonah, who is 24 and Autistic, decided that he couldn’t abide setting foot into a single store. The reasons were complicated but we honored his requests and jumped through lots of hoops to meet his needs as well as the needs of the home and family.

But lately his stance has softened a bit and we have tried a couple of thrift stores, just to get our feet wet. So far it’s a win and it’s fun to let him pick out the things he likes! It’s also great that they don’t cost too much because chances are he won’t actually keep any of it for long!

#beautyinthereal

Caregiving can be beautiful and painful all at the same time. Whether it is your job, your family obligation or your joy, it can all be your ministry when it’s done “as unto the LORD”.

Here are a few perspectives that have helped me to hold on to faith through that hard seasons of my own caregiving journey. I pray that they will encourage you as well.

💛 R~

#beautyinthereal

Jonah Joined the Grandma Water Aerobic class this morning and it was the most fun we’ve ever had at the Y! Here is a Live Live to tell you all about it.

#beautyinthereal

In two days, I will enter my decaf era. Please say a prayer for me during this bold and slightly questionable life decision.

After connecting a few dots between my sleep score, stress levels, and my deep emotional reliance on caffeine, I’m attempting something radical. Like getting in touch with actual reality again.

I have pre-scheduled sick days for this weekend because I fully expect to be battling a withdrawal headache and the kind of sleepiness usually reserved for infants and the elderly.

Taking a moment to say goodbye to Diet Coke, which has become a loyal companion, a personality trait, and quite possibly a spiritual gift.

Shout out to my husband who has bravely volunteered as my emotional support human, primary caregiver to Jonah, and official witness to whatever version of me emerges from this caffeine detox.

I have a feeling this might involve:
• Feeling my feelings without a latte buffer
• Discovering my patience level may have been artificially enhanced
• Letting God carry what I’ve been trying to out-caffeinate

We’ll call it an experiment in sleep, stress, and surrender. Hoping on the other side of this I find real rest for my heart, mind, soul, and body.

If I start speaking more slowly, blinking thoughtfully, or staring into the distance like I just uncovered a life truth, just know I’m either detoxing or actually discovering a life truth 😜

I should be back to some version of normal once my body recalibrates. Until then, expect plot twists, dramatic yawns, and an occasional identity crisis in the kitchen.

Have you ever attempted this? How did it go?

#beautyinthereal

Jonah wants to know where you would pick to go for vacation!

As for me, I would definitely pick “swimming in the seashore” but I would also pick HAWAII because I can do all those things!

Jonah was born there and he is itching to get back!

#beautyinthereal

This one is going to hit a little differently.
I have a new podcast episode out and I am both excited and terrified that you might go listen to it!

It is a very vulnerable conversation with Tori Hein and she attempts to scratch at the surface of the grief that so many of us try to keep buried.

My prayer is that it might lead you to the same freedom that I am seeking for my own heart.

Links to Spotify, Apple & YouTube are in my linktree.

#beautyinthereal #specialneedsmom

Jonah has this song on repeat all year long… but it is especially beautiful today… at 6am, on full volume. 😍🤣 With his amazing voice joining in.

And no, he doesn’t allow me to sing with him. But in my heart I am declaring these words along with all of you who put your faith in Jesus. He did, indeed arise and because of that, we have hope beyond our circumstances and we can truly find Beauty In The Real and Joy with each new day.

Happy Easter to all our beloved Instagram Aunties. 😘

#beautyinthereal

It’s Good Friday.

For those who follow Jesus, it’s a day to pause and reflect on the message of the Cross, though, for many of us, that message is never far from our minds.

If you look at the Christians in your life and think their belief sounds foolish, you’re not alone. Many of us have thought the same at one time or another.

But that was before.

Before we understood how
lost we really were.

Before we experienced the depth of God’s grace and mercy poured
out on us.

Before we received the gift of faith and encountered the living presence of God dwelling within us.

The message of the Cross doesn’t promise to fix every circumstance.
But it gives a hope that reaches beyond them.

It is this hope that sustains me.
And it is this hope I pray you come to know.

#beautyinthereal

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